a very wonderful day

I got thinking about opening up a resourceful place for those that have gotten into trouble, as I had. I’ve been thinking about it all day.

I remember being asked by a woman at the court house, after being released, about going into their rehab. It was a court appointed group – basically a psychologist that I would’ve seen for the duration of my hearings.

I agreed to the program, asked that I continue seeing my psychologist and went about my way. I remember feeling that what the court/the state offered, wasn’t good enough. I wished their were more resources to choose from. I remember feeling that if others were not given this option, that they’d probably go back to scamming.

Going through the legal aspect of what I had done, was terrifying. For someone that had never gotten into legal trouble, any trouble really, to go through this, was scary.

I wish there were a rehab I could’ve gone to. I wish I could’ve gone to a quiet setting and to have had therapy as much as I wanted, when I wanted it. I wish there was a place I could’ve gone to with others like me around. I wish that I was surrounded by others that I could’ve trusted with this information. I wish so badly that I had all of these things.

I’m fortunate to have had what I did – that make huge improvements in my life. I’m thankful for the therapist I had, the few people that supported me. But really, I wish I had more people that I trusted through this, I trusted only one.

Perhaps someday, I will do this. My dream is to help others that will travel the same path as I did or those that feel they need to go in that direction. I fully believe in people hitting their rock bottom because it’s often what we need, but the padding on that bottom should be a little softer. And as they rise, I believe they should have people around them that are understanding and forgiving. How else would we expect anyone of this nature, to go back into society and not repeat what they’ve done – without help?

One day, this dream will come true. One day, I will have the people I need in order to complete this dream. I will pull all of the talented and artistic folks I know and trust - to help go into this direction. I will pull the smartest and kindest, the most forgiving and safe - that's what 'we' needed - that's what 'we' deserve.